We're taking Christmas Day off (woo hoo!) to relax and eat and drink and temporarily forget about rape, Amy Winehouse, missing white women, Paul Janka, Jamie Lynn Spears, Photoshopped celebs, Sherri Shepherd, hookers, victims, doormats, Tyra Banks, and well, just female trouble in general. Speaking of which, we leave you with one of our favorite Christmas scenes in cinematic history, from John Waters' Female Trouble. We hope you get the cha-cha heels of your dreams this holiday season!

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