According to various sources, George Clooney is looking good. And, says one geneticist, he is only getting better-looking with time. "Unlike most carbon-based organisms," the Princeton scientist notes, "Clooney, with his puppy-dog eyes and salt-and-pepper hair, has aged like a fine wine." A recent poll revealed that 18% of respondents described Clooney as looking "distinguished," 11% found him looking "sharp," and 3% found him looking "square-jawed and rugged, yet stately and reserved, as one would expect a baron or king to look." Clooney had no comment. [The Onion]