Benazir Bhutto To More: People Like Me "Now That I'm Fat"

Back when she was exiled from her country for embezzling hundreds of millions of dollars from the government, Pakistani prez Benazir Bhutto didn't seem that awesome of a leader. But we figured she'd done something to redeem herself, because we read this piece about her in Glamour this month, and it was so totally ass-kissy! And then we discovered More. It purports to be a magazine for middle-aged women, but it is actually a magazine for women who...um...just want, like, "more" information! And in the December issue we learn a lot more about Benazir! Namely, menopause has made her more popular with the Pakistanis. "Now that I'm fat and 50, I'm a mother figure. I find that aspect of aging liberating; there's no danger of people misunderstanding you," she says. And it's a good thing, because as the piece points out, she and her husband are worth more than $400 million, "much of it inherited, part of it without such clear provenance" — and she wouldn't want that to cause any misunderstandings!

Benazir Bhutto To More: People Like Me "Now That I'm Fat"

Also: she is constantly fighting with her extended family over her family's estate and her poet niece Fatima, who seems pretty funny and interesting, hates her, her "library" is stocked with mostly self-help and diet books, her daughter spends all her time on hip-hop message boards because even she does not believe her mother's threats to make her return to Pakistan if she keeps failing out of school and her house is a total mess. She has a dog named Caesar who seems to be the only one who didn't expect Pakistan to implode in a flurry of mass arrests when she returned.

But hey! She's so approachably plump these days! What's not to love? Think it would work for Judi Giuliani?