Over the weekend I watched Keeping Up With The Kardashians for the first time, and watching Bruce Jenner's resigned, paralyzed-looking face spliced up against scenes of his nine-year-old skipping around the household stripper pole to observe their elder sisters' trip to the Mexican estate of Girls Gone Wild founder Joe Francis, I started thinking idly about what Norman Mailer would have to say about it. And about then I decided I didn't want to know. Moving on, so: Hillary Clinton has started pairing her pantsuits with boots, a nun who abused hundreds of students throughout the sixties is finally being brought to justice and the well-liked priest who stalked Conan O'Brien turned himself into a news studio over the weekend. Banks are expected to take up to $400 billion more dollars in writeoffs, which wasn't good for today's market, but the Energy Department projected gas prices will rise another 20 cents a gallon — and the Gulf States have money to burn — ha ha, literally too! — on big-ticket exports, which is why it's a little depressing they're favoring Airbus to manufacture planes for them despite the fact that we're not the ones demanding they pay in Euros.

Benazir Bhutto has joined some guy who sold nuclear weapons secrets to North Korea in house arrest in Pakistan and, um, Howard Dean decreed Jews worthy of admittance to Heaven. (Mazel Tov, guys!) And with just two little months before the campaigning begins, for real...

Well, Obama is handing out glow necklaces in Iowa, while Meghan McCain and Cate Edwards campaign for their dads in New Hamsphire.

Contact information for this author is not available.