Washington D.C.'s Lotus Lounge had the genius idea to combine two of our favorite things, politics and alcohol! They've named a drink on their menu for each of the presidential candidates — and are attempting to predict the election outcome based on which drink sells best, which is nuts, but fun. Some of the drinks are downright genius: The Dennis Kucinich "Impeachment" (Stoli Peach, Stoli O, and a splash of orange juice). Some seem like the bartender got a little lazy: The Chris Dodd "Milk Dodd" is brandy, dark crème de caoco, half & half, fresh nutmeg... To reflect Dodd's white hair? But what the fuck is up with "The Hillartini"?
The Hillartini, you see, is actually just a Cosmo. Says Lotus Lounge, "The drink is pink and feminine, yet strong and bold." Says us: Wha? There are many things that Hillary is. She is surprisingly funny and even a little goofy, on occasion. She has an of old-fashionedness to her. (We heard her say "golly" once. Seriously.) She is wicked smart. But "pink and feminine"? Is it pink just because she's a girl? We think Hillary's more like the kind of girls we are: More like a vodka tonic drinker. Or maybe just some Jack, straight up. But sugary, pink stuff that tastes like the bubblegum scraped off the bottom of a movie theatre chair? No fucking way.
(We do appreciate, however, that they saddled Giuliani with an apple martini. Because that's a total girl drink. And Rudy's a drag queen, after all.)
Hey, is it happy hour yet???