The Glamour Guide To Antidepressants: Vaguely Numbing, Unsatisfying

The November Glamour contains a 12-page guide to "the #1 drug women are taking" — antidepressants, duh — replete with tempting pictures of artfully styled colored prescription pills, and as the one person I knew who had never taken them but probably should have, I devoured it in hopes of learning something new. And I did! Turns out Kentucky and Utah have the most patients taking antidepressants! Utah, really? Is there some legislative/regulatory reason for this? Are SSRIs the Mormon answer to getting loaded? Yeah, they don't answer that. But there was so much more!

To summarize: sometimes people feel bad because life lacks fulfillment and getting dumped sucks a lot and antidepressants will probably help you with that although you should wait awhile before you take them, preferably until that point when you are mainly depressed because you are still so fucking depressed, and what the fuck is wrong with you already — yeah, that's when even the most conservative shrink will cough up a scrip. Some people gain weight and lose their desire to fuck, whereas some people do not, and generally the people who feel the best on the pills keep taking them, whereas the people who feel a little iffy about them stop. You're not supposed to drink on antidepressants and we're just going to act like nobody does even though everybody does, and in any event, pills will only help you in the event that you concurrently waste a shitload of money on therapy.

I think I'm depressed that I actually just wasted Adderall reading that.