Unlike Mother Teresa, 85% Of 'Glamour' Readers Believe That God Exists

Perhaps you've heard the news that Mother Teresa did not so much believe in God. (Also: could have used more seratonin!) Having recently attended both a Catholic mass and a shabbat service at Jerusalem's hallowed Wailing Wall, we can empathize with the old nun — nothing shakes up one's comfy time-worn faith in a Higher Power like the spooky feeling of being surrounded by an organized group of people who have made God the central focus of their existence. But if you can't get to the Holy Land, we've found a place on the internet that achieves a remarkably similar result! It's the Glamour online spirituality poll, to which we subjected the Jezebels just so we could experience their astonishment as to what fellow Glamour readers apparently believe. Like: more than 85% believe in God, yet only 1% believe God is a female. And it gets sooooo much more logical!

Wondered Dodai, a "heathen": "61% believe in Hell, but only 59% believe in Satan. Who do those other people think is running shit down there? DINOSAURS?" (Or maybe some former fuckbuddies of "Lucy"?) Also: more than half pray in bed — while trying out the latest position? Almost 40% say they have read "pretty much the whole" Bible — an act which we know FOR A FACT is the hands-down most effective strategy at killing one's faith in God. And while 78% believe in angels, only 51% believe in Demons. "Where's the equal opportunity?" Dodai wanted to know. Hahahaha too bad she can't ask Mother Teresa, who could never become a Priest because, duh, she was born with a vagina. Too bad she's DEAD!

Are You A Spiritual Person? [Glamour]