Mattel Inc., maker of Barbie dolls and poisoner of children everywhere, went to court yesterday to protect the good girl image of its iconic bestseller, whose rep is in danger of being tarnished by pornography. In a lawsuit Mattel filed against Global China Networks, they claim that adult entertainer China Barbie is trying to profit from the name Barbie by associating herself with the famous doll, which is in violation of Mattel's trademark and that China's domain name containing the word "Barbie" was used in a "bad faith attempt to profit from Mattel's Barbie trademarks." Any association with a porn star would ruin the carefully-crafted image they've cultivated for Barbie over the past 48 years. Uh, does Mattel have any idea how little girls really play with Barbies? We're positive that the story lines we acted out with our Barbies when we were kids would've been too dirty for late-night Cinemax!

Also, has Mattel taken a good look at its own products lately? Barbie is looking more and more whorish every year! Even the pricier collector's editions, like the Kimora Lee Simmons doll (pictured above) look like streetwalkers! Anyway, the lawsuit asks the court to award up to $100,000 in damages, that China Barbie's domain name registration be transferred to Mattel, and that any profits made Global China Networks be given to Mattel. China Barbie—who describes herself as a "cordial young lady"—has stared in such hit films as Me Luv You Long Time and Ethnic Cheerleaders 8 to name a few. Frankly, we'd never heard of them before. But thanks to Mattel, and they're quest to keep their name "pure", now we have!
Porn Star Barbie? [MSNBC]