What Not To Wear (If You're Fat)

The Mirror has a list of tips on what to wear if you feel you're thin and want to "dress yourself curvy." "Many skinny women don't feel sexy, they feel gawky or boyish." Oh really? Boo-hoo. (Guess what "curvy" women feel like? Shrek!) "Being tall and thin there is a long list of clothes that you can wear," the story continues, casually reminding thousands of more portly readers of the fashions that are not available to them. The list includes: "Thick and busy fabrics" (which give "greater visual presence"); "low-waisted, straight-legged boy-cut jeans" and "eye-catching large prints." The paper also suggests that skinnies avoid "stretchy wrap-dresses." This is one garment that always looks better on "real people" than catwalk models." Take that, skinny bitches! Leave the wrap dresses to us "real people."
What to Wear If You're Skinny [Mirror; Image via Modern Mechanix]