As some of you may have heard, Moe is in Israel for the next couple of days for a wedding so, in her place, we've secured a guest-blogger, "Heather", to provide us with her singular wit and wisdom from today through next Wednesday. Note: This "Heather" is not to be confused with last Friday's guest-blogger "Heather"; soon after that Heather's stint guest-blogging she smacked her inattentive boyfriend upside the head with his iPhone (we don't blame her!) and hasn't been heard from since. Anyway, we're sick of typing the word "Heather" so let's just get on with it, shall we?

Send an email to Anna Holmes, the author of this post, at anna@jezebel.com.