Sykes Sisters' Brother Too Pussy To Watch His Wife Reenact 'Knocked Up'

Tom Sykes is the brother of New York socialites Plum and Lucy Sykes. But is he as despicable as they are? We've always thought, 'no', since he is, you know, a drunk, and drunks are more fun and less thin than Vogue 'editors.' But he is so determined to try! Today he writes in Britain's Daily Mirror that he doesn't want to watch his wife give birth after seeing Knocked Up. What a bastard! But here's the catch: He has already seen his wife give birth. And he knows: It's boring! But also anxiety-inducing! And not pretty! Such internal conflict. Maybe he should start drinking again? Meanwhile, a certain member of the Axis of Evil just started allowing fathers into the delivery room for the first time. Oh G-D. Yeah yeah draw your own conclusions, liquor jokes, etc. with the help of a predictably-loathsome excerpt from Sykes' story after the jump.

Another little-mentioned reason why many men would rather not be in the room for the birth is that the whole performance is seriously unsexy. The one bit of advice all men give other men is: 'Stay up at the top end.' But, like all the best advice, it is destined to be ignored. The average guy thinks: "Well, a quick peek can't hurt, can it?" Yes, it can. Jewish religious laws forbid the presence of the man at the birth, to preserve their wife's dignity. What smart thinking.

It's Messy, Scary And Puts You Off Sex. Why I Don't Want To Watch My Wife Give Birth! [Daily Mail]
Related:
Fathers-to-Be Allowed In Delivery Room For First Time In Iran
[Guardian]
A Perilous Journey From Delivery Room To Bedroom [NYTimes, sub. req'd]