Paging Ms. Winehouse — Dr. Jezebel Will See You Now

Our fave U.K. tabloid The Sun has another medical emergency regarding soulful songstress Amy Winehouse! This time, the singer seems to have something white up one nostril. Whatever could it be? We decide to consult our favorite doctor, WebMD. After all, the symptom checker always makes house calls!

We click "head," and then "nose," and are faced with several choices: Pain or discomfort, runny nose, drainage or pus, nosebleed, nasal congestion or difficulty breathing. Hmm. Tough one! Hard to tell if Amy's in any pain. And it's not exactly a discharge. But if something is up there, she must be congested or have trouble breathing. Let's try congested.

Okay ! Nine conditions associated with that symptom: Congestion, hay fever, acute sinusitis, indoor allergens, nasal polyps, foreign object in the nose — wait! That might be the problem! No need to forge ahead to nonallergic rhinitis, whooping cough or ricin poisoning.

Paging Ms. Winehouse — Dr. Jezebel Will See You Now

Back to 'foreign objects'. "The nose is a surprisingly deep space," WebMD informs us. "Only the imagination limits the objects and circumstances that result in things getting stuck inside the nose." Hmmm. Does Amy have an overactive imagination? "Common objects found in noses include food material, tissue paper, beads, toys and rocks." That's it, it must be a rock. A small white rock. Right? So, what should Amy do? "An object that is simply stuck in the nose and not causing other symptoms can usually wait until morning or the following day for removal. The object does, however, have to be completely removed quickly and without discomfort and danger." Hear that, Amy? You can make an appointment for tomorrow! Everything is going to be just fine.

What's Up With Amy Winenose? [TheSun]
Symptom Checker [WebMD]
Earlier: Paging Dr. Jezebel... Amy Winehouse Needs Us, STAT!