Miss New Jersey Amy Polumbo has finally released the too-hot-for-moral-terpitude-clauses Facebook pictures to the same Today Show she refused to show them two days ago and um we are not exactly scrambling to swap our remote control batteries if you catch our drift. And it's not just these Rees/Barba/Suicide Girls-stimulated times; we'd wager Victorian Brits and Tablighi Muslims would have an equally tough time squeezing any sort of arousal out of these. She is completely fully clothed. But here's why you should watch the clip anyway! So you can tell us if she doesn't look kinda mall-Goth in that one Halloween picture with the oranges on her tits? She says she's a theater major, and judging from these pictures she actually looks...maybe kinda actually fun? Like, she says some stupid shit, like "I barely drink, I'm a singer," and you're all, "ever heard of Amy Winehouse?"
But other than that she totally entered the pageant on a dare from one of her many gay theater major friends and is on the whole, a lot less obnoxious than, um, anyone else this blog forces us to think about on a regular basis. So if this isn't a publicity stunt, she's cool by us. And if it is a sick publicity stunt, it's the first thing we've seen in years that makes Miss America seem sort of relevant to girls who were not home-schooled and thus, pretty smart.