Paris And Lindsay Make Peace; Britney's New BF Is Off The Sauce But On The Crack

  • The Paris-Lindsay truce is officially on, thanks to Paris' appearance at Lindsay's 4th of July makeoutfest. (Side note: new Lindsay boyfriend is either some soap star's son or some legendary horrible diva's son, both of whom we're pretty sure she can relate to!) Official reason given for the warming of relations is shifting alliances, balance of power and the taste of the lost freedoms both might endure if this cold war continued... yeah, yeah, you get the joke. [Rush & Molloy]
  • "She's my rock." That's 38-year-old recovering alcoholic John Sundahl on... Britney Spears! Sometimes dry drunks still slur their speech so we're thinking he was misquoted attempting to say "dumb as a..." but, apparently, they're screwing! [We are not sure why but the only place we can find this online right now is China Daily]
  • Ewww: Harry Potter has pubes and gets all "deal with it." [Page Six]
  • OMG double ew: Rudy and Judi are hooked on that premium channel "upscale randy" boobiefest "The Tudors." [Page Six]
  • Prince Harry threatens to quit the army if they don't figure out how to conceal his identity while he hits on Canadian strippers. [Page Six]