Will Bono Ever Find The Humanitarian Cause He Is Looking For?

  • Because the continent of Africa is not enough, Bono has founded a nonprofit to ensure that our next president makes poverty a key item on his (or her!) agenda. Seriously, is there anything bigger than this guy's heart? Besides maybe his collection of "funky" sunglasses? [CNN]
  • Female inmates in Florida reach out to fellow jailbird sister Paris, bearing beauty tips (that veer heavy on the Crystal Light reliance. Maybe because it has the word "crystal" in it.) [ABC News]
  • Jaime Lee Curtis is thisclose to taking her beef with Kathy Hilton and her whiny daughter what's-her-name-the-one-in-jail outside. [HuffPo]
  • And SPEAKING of incarcerated women, Gloria Allred has appeared on the scene with a client she claims was — holy itshay! — not treated so nice, compared to Paris. [TMZ]
  • Since Karl Rove et al can't bust filmmaker Michael Moore on charges of, like, being a counter-revolutionary running dog, they instead hope to get him for that cigar run to Cuba. Uh, wasn't that guy supposed to be some shrewd genius of public manipulation? Does this really go down in the red states? Really, we're curious. [USA Today]
  • Why we don't ride roller coasters. [CNN]
  • Sex offenders: younger, more violent. This would affect us more if we ever left our houses, but for the rest of you, be safe, and maybe carry mace? [CNN]
  • Two U.S. casaulties identified. [DoD]