Once a week, our friend Slut Machine (link NSFW) presents her take on the week's girlie gabfests. Inside: More on Barbara Walters' sex life (no one-night stands? Seriously?), Tyra pratfalls and Kathy Griffin and some gays. Click play to experience the insanity through another's eyes. Plus, after the jump, see stills and commentary on the week's other bits.

It's a Barbara-heavy clip show this week, because I feel like we should cherish every second we have with her, since she could be leaving us any week now. I don't mean that she's gonna die (although she is knocking on 80), it's just that they might sign a new co-host to The View soon, and then we'll be back to only being graced with Barbara's presence, and her pervy mind, one or two days a week.

Oprah was pretty awesome this week. She had a show about tolerance, on which she interviewed a former Nazi skinhead and his new friend, a homosexual whom he'd beaten up 26 years earlier. She also featured some star-studded interviews with Bono, author Cormac McCarthy, and Michael Moore, who btw, is turning into a butch lesbian.

Barbara Walters Has Never Had A 'Walk Of Shame'

Nora Ephron, Geena Davis and Diahann Carroll were on the couch discussing how nice, but ultimately shitty aging is. But if I look like Diahann Carroll when I'm 71, I don't think I'd be all that bothered by the process.

Barbara Walters Has Never Had A 'Walk Of Shame'

Seriously! 71! Can you believe that? Black don't crack, for real.

Speaking of crack...

Barbara Walters Has Never Had A 'Walk Of Shame'

I'm having major withdrawal issues with no new Tyra episodes. The reruns are functioning as my methadone right now. Check out the clip we posted about the rerun this week where Tyra interviews a lady with a smelly crotch disease that keeps her trapped in her home.

It seems like Kathy Griffin is the front runner for this co-hosting gig on The View. She's been on four times in the last month—three of which have been in the last two weeks since Ro left. I could live with her as a replacement. Her interactions with Babs are terrific and she seems to make Elisabeth incredibly uncomfortable, which is a plus.

Sherri Shepherd guest co-hosted again this week, and holy crap, I hate her so. I've talked about it before.

Barbara Walters Has Never Had A 'Walk Of Shame'


She started running her mouth off about God and stuff, which is fine, whatevs, but then she started getting into the whole Creationism thing. I am completely baffled by people who refuse to believe in evolution, and dismiss all irrefutable scientific facts. Sherri said, "I absolutely do not believe that we came from primates." Like she was offended by the idea. She seems to think that Darwin implies that a monkey pushed a human out of its vagina one day, and that's how we came to be. Idiot!

Babs laid into her with that. She asked Sherri if she ever read Darwin or if she understands the theory of evolution. Of course Sherri said no. And then Babs was like, "Well, you ought to educate yourself and read the texts because you have a child now, so you should know these things." LOVE HER!