More Proof That The Rich (And Royal) Shall Inherit The Earth

  • George Soros and Queen Noor are friends with benefits. For the uninitiated, she's the widow of the late King Hussein of Jordan; he made billions in this huge mindfuck of a bet against the British pound in the '80s and now uses the money for good, sort of like Angelina Jolie, but, you know, with three more zeroes in his bank account. [Rush & Molloy]
  • Reps at the NYC hotspot Tenjune insist they did not serve Lindsay Lohan any alcohol recently. Think they might be sick of her enough by now that it's actually true? [Rush & Molloy]
  • The widow of Dr. Atkins lives in fear of psychotic dieters angry about their smelly pee, failure to reach ketosis. Yeah, no, not really, but we'd probably be paranoid all the time too if we were still afraid of eating root vegetables. {Page Six]
  • American Idol contestant caught in liplock with Simon Cowell calls a certain body part "soft" and "thin." Yeah, we're stretching it a bit. [People]
  • Drew Barrymore fights world hunger, saves money by drinking at dive bars in D.C. We don't know why she's in D.C., since we're pretty sure the U.N. is around the corner from us, but now that Angelina's is suddenly committed to fucking Brad again one of the most beautiful people in the world had to pick up the slack! [Washington Post]