The Centers For Disease Control today warned that gonorrhea is becoming dangerously resistant to Cipro, leaving sufferers with just a single class of injection-only antibiotics capable of curing it.
It's not the first time the CDC has warned us about gonorrhea's increasing resistance to antibiotics, however. In 2002 and 2004, Hawaiian, Californian and homosexual gonorrhea carriers were informed their strains were probably too strong for even the anthrax-fighting Cipro. And now, says the Wall Street Journal, the disease has spread to the point that the most disease-resistant city in America is Philadelphia. Having had sex not only in Philly but in California and the Hawaiian Tropic Zone (don't ask), we began to worry: Might we have gonorrhea? After the jump, the [Often disgusting! -Ed.] specifics of our consultation with our resident sex expert, Slut Machine.
Moegetsaround: have you ever had Gonorrhea
Moegetsaround: so apparently it's fast becoming resistant to the longtime standard antibiotic
Moegetsaround: it's joining the list of "superbugs"
slutmachine: i took 500mg of cipro
slutmachine: that's because everyone has it
Moegetsaround: think i do?
Moegetsaround: how would I know
slutmachine: you would know
Moegetsaround: does it smell?
Moegetsaround: I feel like I'm always smelling.
slutmachine: actually, mine morphed from gonorrhea into bacterial vaginosis, so maybe it was resistant to the antibiotics
slutmachine: it drips
slutmachine: actually, it plops
Moegetsaround: Oh, i've totally had bacterial vaginosis
Moegetsaround: it PLOPS?
slutmachine: i remember i was squatting over a toilet to pee and all of sudden i heard this bip plop and there was like a dollop of like really really old sour milk on the toilet seat [That was just fucking unnecessary. -Ed]
slutmachine: i thought it was a yeast infection, which i've actually never had
Moegetsaround: you've had a yeast infection
Moegetsaround: there is just no fucking way
slutmachine: but then the next morning i got a call from a dude saying he had gonorrhea and he probs gave it to me, which he did
slutmachine: some girls aren't prone to them
slutmachine: i constantly get UTIs
slutmachine: i think that's the trade off
slutmachine: i have UTIs like every fucking week
Moegetsaround: I used to have those
Moegetsaround: I have it all!
slutmachine: it's better now that i've only been sleeping with one person
slutmachine: i may not grow babies, but i grow whole civilizations of bacteria in my vagina!