Meet Knut:

The Cute Polar Bear Cub Must Die

Knut is a darling little polar bear cub born in a zoo in Berlin, Germany, last December, who was rejected by his mother. We all know how that feels, right?

Anyway, zoo staff kept him alive by bottle feeding him and cuddling him and probably talking to him in that stupid voice that women over 30 who are unmarried use exclusively for their cats. So far so good, huh?

Oh dear. Those gloomy German animal rights activists disagree. They'd like to kill Knut now, because he should never have survived in the first place, so he ought to be dead, so he ought to be killed.

""The zoo must kill the bear," said spokesman Frank Albrecht. "Feeding by hand is not species-appropriate but a gross violation of animal protection laws."

We can't help but note that killing an animal may also be a gross violation of animal protection laws, but we aren't tofu-munching vegan wicca adherents, so what do we know.

BONUS: A year's free subscription to Peta, to the first person to mention Nazis.

We Want This Baby Polar Bear Dead [Daily Mail]