Yes Girls, Even Your Vagina is Fat & Ugly.

As if the preponderance of pube-less Hollywood starlets and vaginal plastic surgery aren't enough to make you question societal standards of female "beauty", now vulnerable American women can worry about what's inside their pussies as well. Just thank the geniuses behind PK24, a new natural, "24-hour tightening cream" that promises "feminine esteem" by purporting to "tighten and plump the entire interior wall of the vagina".

According to the company's FAQ section:

Women of all ages are finding PK24 to be the breakthrough solution to achieving a firmer, tighter and more youthful vagina.

And how does it feel to have this firmer, tighter, and more baby-soft vagina, we ask?

Because the effects are completely internal you are not aware of how tight your vagina has become until you are sexually active.

Sounds painful, actually. What about pregnancy? Can we get knocked up yet still have a crazy-tight pussy?

We know of no adverse side effects as a result of using PK24. Ask Your Doctor. We encourage anyone with any concerns to always consult with your health care professional or practitioner for any medical advice, concerns or conditions.

Ah, we get it. You don't know about adverse side effects the same way you don't know that the words "your" and "doctor" are rarely capitalized in the midst of a sentence. Are you and your product from the United States?

Yes. PK24 meets GMP standards. This is a very important question.

Yes it is. And y'all can kiss our flabby, hairy asses.