Though the Eiffel 69 is an incontrovertibly good (dare I say: revolutionary) sexual position, the Regular 69 tends to inspire mixed reactions. Do you like it? Did you used to do it because you were like, “Yeah, sure, I’m theoretically interested in having more complicated sex than the gold standard position of One Person Stay Pretty Still While The Other One Does Something More Interesting” but then about six months later you were like, “But also, I’d rather not?” Have you always hated 69 because are you kidding me? Are you the troll on Jez staff who said they last 69'd in 1918? Are you too afraid of pooping? Are you the one who said you’re a virg?
Here are the results of an anonymous staff survey I asked everyone to do over Google Forms. A lot of us had to think for a minute. Do you remember your last 69?
Maybe your bubble would say “January 21, 2016, 8:35 a.m.” I don’t know your life, just like all these people don’t know what 69 is.
I clicked that top link, and “Rockstar Mommy” wrote “it is not a bad number, it is the greatest number on the planet, Right next to 420.”
Do you agree?
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Image via Shutterstock, illustration by Tara Jacoby