Did you know that being Andy Warhol's alleged cousin grants one free license to make very ugly paintings of celebrities and have it be considered art? It's true! Case in point: Monica Warhol, who created the world's ugliest Kim Kardashian artwork — reportedly for Kanye West (because duh).
"There's no way Andy Warhol would not have painted her," says Monica. "Kim is manufactured gorgeous and is beyond fabulous. How could Andy not have been inspired to paint her like he did Marilyn Monroe and Elizabeth Taylor?" How indeed. [InTouch]
Newer reports say that Kanye did not, in fact, commission the painting. Which makes sense because it is — again — very, very ugly. And so the tender planet of Internet gossip continues its orbit, powered by the gravitational pull of conflicting information. [E!]
A jewelry store employee has come forward with a beautiful story about Paul Walker (I'm crying already): the actor was in a fancy jewelry store at the same time as a soldier who'd just returned from Iraq and his fiancee. According to the employee, Walker overheard the couple looking at a $10,000 engagement ring and then anonymously bought it for them:
"[The fiancee] saw something that she really, really liked, but he said, 'Honey, I can't afford that.' Paul called the manager and he said, 'Umm, the ring that those people are looking at – put it on my tab… Soon after that, he just left."
I'll just be sitting here, crying quietly for a while. [NY Daily News]
The extraordinarily talented and beautiful Lupita Nyong'o covered DuJour magazine and talked about her "bizarre" (as she termed it) ascendancy into the spotlight. But she's not overwhelmed yet: "Lots of people come up and touch my back and want to give me a hug," she said. "At this point, it's not too crazy. I let them hug me." Also we learn that she's in a book club (O! to join that book club!) and that her ideal night out is having a slumber party at her best friend's house. [DuJour]
- Future posted a picture of Ciara drinking champagne, so she's probably not pregnant. And thus the Instagram Detectives crack yet another pressing case. [Bossip]
- Shailene Woodley hosted the inaugural talk of this year's very important Short Hair Actress Conference. [E!]
- Selena Gomez wore a cool wig. [E!]
- A middle schooler sent A$AP Rocky the best fan letter ever but it went to the wrong address. FORTUNATELY, the Internet is always connecting people so now we may all read it. [Noisey]
- A rumor was floating around that Victoria's Secret model Jessica Hart was fired after throwing shade upon Taylor Swift (she said the singer "didn't fit" at the VS fashion show). It's not true. So, uh, carry on with your life, I guess. [Gossip Cop]
- Beyonce and Jay Z are going vegan for 22 days. [Just Jared]
- James Franco would like to be considered for Best Supporting Actor for playing Alien in Spring Breakers. I will consider him if he promises to make a new "look at my shit"monologue in place of an acceptance speech. [The Hollywood Reporter]
- Here's the Miley Cyrus ugly Christmas sweater of your dreams. [MTV]
- Tom Daley's boyfriend is maybe Milk writer Dustin Lance Black. [Just Jared]
- Lindsay Lohan is "cozying up" to Liam Neeson's son (i.e., someone saw them entering the woman's bathroom together at some night club). Quick, someone get the rights to this Page Six story and adapt it into a screenplay for Taken 3, the film event of the century. [Page Six]
- Kourtney Kardashian and Scott Disick went to the University of Arizona to pour vodka on students (or something like that) and they whipped everyone into a Dionysian frenzy. [Perez Hilton]
- One time Britney Spears played Spin the Bottle with Ryan Gosling. [E!]
Lede images via InTouch and Instagram.